Top 5 Parenting Phrases

8:53 PM


I love my son and I tell him so at least 75,027 times a day (approximately), so I’m not going to count the variations of “I love you” in this post.  But day in and day out, it seems that I’m repeating the same five phrases over and over again to my handsome little devil.  Here’s my top 5 list of phrases I say to my 16-month-old son.  How do you compare?

5. “Don’t feed the dogs your food!”  Our poor dogs must be so confused.  As soon as we tell them to back away from a snacking Atticus, he tries to coax them over with whatever he’s eating.  I can’t really blame them too harshly for always taking food from Atticus, because really, he’s giving it to them freely.  Even so, sometimes I have to put them in the lower level because Atticus needs to eat in peace.  And when I do, Atticus yells “NO! NO!” at me and takes his first opportunity to push his snacks through the gate to his imprisoned BFFs.

 Don’t worry guys, that mean old Mom can’t keep me from feeding you my graham crackers.

4. “Thank you for helping!”  They can’t all be negative, right?  As much as I can, I try to point out good behaviors.  Believe me, some days I’m really searching for some behavior to thank. “Thank you for sweeping!” is an almost-daily affirmation.  He’s just so good at it.

Thanks for picking up my slack, kiddo.

3.  The “Hokey Pokey.”  Atticus does the whole dance and then bows at the end.  If he was a baby beauty queen on Toddlers and Tiaras, it would be his talent.  He was in the middle of hysterics at the doctors office after an exam and shots, but stopped to dance when I started singing.  I don’t know how long it’ll last, but believe you me, I’m going to milk the Hokey Pokey as long as it works. 

2.  "Get your hand out of there!”  And “there” refers to any number of dirty or dangerous places: the toilet, the garbage, the dogs’ mouths, the dogs’ food, the kitty food, the DVDs, the diaper pail, the electrical sockets (he knows how to pull those plastic plugs out), nightstand drawers, bathroom drawers... just to name a few.  We’ve baby-proofed and baby-proofed again, but he’s an evil genius and has foiled most of our plans. 

Oh, hey Mom and Dad, just writing my name in the carpet powder.  No biggie. 


1.  “Get your hand out of your pants!”  Similar to “Get your hand out of there!” but said so many times that it actually gets its own number, and the #1 spot to boot.  I put him in a onesie and pants, and he manages to yank the pants off and wiggle his hand up into his onesie and diaper via the leg hole.  I thought this crap wasn’t supposed to start until middle school.  

I have pictures but can’t bring myself to share them with the world.  They're first-girlfriend embarrassment status.  


As I write this list, I know there are other common phrases I say day in and day out to my little mister, but these the ones I feel like I should record and play on repeat to save my voice.  What do (or did) you say to your kids repeatedly?  Let me know in the comments!

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