Emilia McG: June 2014

It's been a long four years

June 25th is a big day. It’s halfway to Christmas. George Orwell’s birthday is today. It’s the anniversary of Michael Jackson’s death.

But most importantly, today is my wedding anniversary.

Look at those sweet baby faces.

I’m not one to get sappy, but holy crap, I’ve been married four years. Sometimes it seems like we just got married, but most days it seems like we’ve been married for much longer.

I don’t mean that in a bad way. Sometimes I just forget Sean wasn’t around for some of the big moments in my life. I can’t believe he never met my Aunt Julie, whom I loved dearly and who died before we started dating. It seems weird that he was graduating high school when I was in seventh grade. Cradle robber.

But even though we’ve only been married a fairly short time, I will say, Sean and I have had our share of heartaches in these short four years. A year after we were married, my dad died very unexpectedly, and I was utterly, completely heartbroken.

He was wearing a Hawaiian shirt under his jacket. Badass.

A few months after his death, I got pregnant with Atticus. To be honest, that year is a hazy, confusing blur. I was overjoyed to be having a child and devastated to know my dad missed out on being a grandfather. There were many nights I couldn’t stop crying, sometimes happy tears, sometimes sad, oftentimes a mixture of both.

Before Atticus turned one, my beautiful grandmother died. Atticus adored her. He always had a smile and a laugh just for her. Of course she loved him too. She loved all of us.

Look at that shorty.

Shortly after Atticus turned a year old, Sean’s mom died. Although she had been in hospice care for a few months, I don’t think anyone is ever really ready for someone to die. There’s always a shock to know someone who was once there won’t be coming back.

Just like with my dad’s death, we found out we were pregnant again a few months after Sean’s mom died. We wanted to wait a few weeks before telling family. We were a few days a way from breaking the news to Sean’s side of the family when his dad died very unexpectedly.

This is such a sweet picture.

It was kind of like something out of fiction. It seemed unreal that we could lose so many important people so quickly. Suddenly my thirty-ish year old husband was the patriarch of a family.

I know now, truly know, that sometimes the worst thing you can imagine actually happens to you. That’s not comforting. I know. But it’s the truth. The worst things you can imagine can happen to you.

And through all of the beautiful and terrible things, the best piece of advice I’ve learned is this: Cling to your God, and cling to your spouse.

At this point, I thought getting through my wedding day was hard. How naive.

I can’t say yet that marriage is hard. For sure, it’s hard moments and periods of adjustment, but what is really hard is life. But if you act out in faith that God hears you and loves you, and act in love and support toward your partner, you can get through these seemingly impossible hard times, whether they come thirty days after you’ve been married or thirty years.

There will be so many more wonderful and horrible things that happen to us in the years to come. But right now, today, I’ve been married for four years to Sean. I love him. I love Atticus and Baby 2.0. And I’d marry him again in a heartbeat.

Cue corny “awwww.”

9:04 PM
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Swim little fishy, swim if you can!

Atticus

8:43 PM
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Night, Ma

Atticus

9:04 PM
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These are a few of my favorite things

Favorite things

8:32 PM
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Behold, the cucumber

cucumbers

6:52 PM
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The second trimester blues

Atticus

There's this idea that during the second trimester most women get a bump in energy--nausea has usually subsided, you're not terrifically huge yet, your pregnancy is pretty well established, and you're all geared up to get ready for baby.

Um, yeah, not for me. Hence my absence last week. I was utterly exhausted. Like, all week. I took two-hour naps with Atticus and practically begged him to sleep longer. Projects, cleaning the house, and anything that was not totally necessary got pushed back until some other time. I even found myself nodding off during Orange is the New Black! You know I was truly tired if Crazy Eyes couldn't keep me from floating off to la-la land.

I love you, Uzo Aduba. Source

Also, I was dreading an upcoming appointment late in the week. Without being too dramatic about it all, I have gestational diabetes (again) and have to start insulin (again). I am now officially a high-risk pregnancy (again).

The good news is that I now have a legit reason to include this image in today's post. Source

Even though I knew it was coming, I'm still a bit bummed. No one really enjoys sharp pokes 5 times a day, right? Luckily I was prepared from my previous experience with Atticus. I've been checking my blood sugar once a week for most of this pregnancy and recently noted that my readings were getting wacky. I actually skipped the 1- and 3-hour glucose tests because I'm such a spectacular and meticulous patient (my words, not my doctors) that my doctor said it would be overkill to do the tests when it's clear that I need insulin (doctor's words).

So yeah, exhaustion, gestational diabetes, and then this weekend, a sick baby. Atticus had a really high fever Saturday and Sunday, to the point that I was worried I might have to take him to Urgent Care or the E.R. He's fine now, but man, he was so miserable. Not to mention we were an hour away from home, at my dear cousin's house ready to party with the family, when he really took a turn for the worse. It broke my heart.

My sweet, sick baby. Also, where'd he get those eyelashes? Mine are like half the length.

He's feeling much better now, thank you very much. Quite silly, in fact. I'll share some of the silliness tomorrow, but right now, my exhaustion is once again overcoming me, and it's time to shoot up--with legally prescribed medication probably derived from pig insulin (source).

Life is good.

7:55 PM
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Thank me later: Indulge

Atticus

9:14 PM
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Maxi power

Maternity style

I woke up really tired today. Atticus woke up around 3 a.m. calling, "Mama! Hi Mama!" He was too wide awake to rock back to sleep, so I brought him to our bed so I could at least doze and maybe lull him back to sleep.

It did not go well for me. He flopped around in our bed for most of the rest of the morning. Consequently, I hit the snooze button about eight times this morning and got out of bed an hour later than what I needed. Good times.

I needed something quick and comfy to throw on this morning.. and if we're being totally honest, I haven't shaved my legs in a few days. Don't judge me; it's hard to bend that far down every day. Dresses, capris, and leggings were out, but it was too hot for jeans.

Enter the maxi skirt.

I feel pretty, oh so pretty.

I love maxi skirts. They feel fancy but not fussy.

I actually had a hard time finding a shirt I liked with this skirt. My maternity shirts all seemed too long and too loose to pair with the long skirt. The proportions just seemed out of balance. I finally dug this stretchy, hot pink gem with a fun little bib pattern out of my non-maternity side of the closet. A short-sleeved cardi to throw over the outfit made it all come together.

Do you know how hard it is to take a selfie of your own chest without a mirror to guide you?

Since I am in desperate need of a haircut, I tamed my wild mane with a few well-placed bobby pins and this cute little barrette. Here's a blurry pic (so sorry) of the barrette in my hair and a clearer shot of the piece:

I may need a trim, but look at that texture! I just can't help but to be cute.

So, this is what I went for when I had about ten minutes to get ready and needed a breezy but modest outfit. What do you think-- was I right to go for a more fitted shirt with my long skirt?

I found some other stylings I'm going to try in the next weeks. I'll share what works and what doesn't as I figure it out.

P.S. I really need to find a better place in my house to take outfit pictures. Anyone want to buy me a fancy full-lenght mirror? I'll love you forever!